Friday, 20 November 2009

If you caught your husband and maid in the act.....

Hello peeps,

May I state clearly here that I DID NOT CATCH MY HUSBAND WITH OUR MAID O.
I saw this article in the Vanguard Newspaper of today the 20th of November(I had to quote the date for the doubting Thomases to confirm)lol

Ehen jare, the article of course caught my attention and I thought it would be fun to know the opinions of blogville!

Maybe I should be the first to comment sef:

First, I don't think I'd employ a maid that will be so grown enough to catch my boo's attention. And i am talking of big boobies(pardon my french), extremely humongous backside and a figure to die for. Isn't that just like leaving fire on my roof over night?

If after scaling first hurdle, he still decided to taste out of her porridge(using Nkenna Naija's rep in BB Revolution's words) then 2 things will surely happen.

1. I will skin the maid alive. She needs the mark to serve as a lesson to her generation yet unborn.

2. I will cut off boo's ''thing''.

Ok, I admit that may be a little mean but mehn, are there really men out there that will sleep with the maid and then jump on madam later same day? They sure suck and should roast in hell fire.

Sunday, 15 November 2009

Randomz Part 6


I am so confused. And to imagine I am confused over what to wear for a parry???? My brother in law's introduction is this coming weekend and I have no flipping idea what to wear. I was gonna do my ankara dress which of cos is a design out of this world only for the bride's family to decide that we have to use ''gele'' and the colour is turquoise blue! My ankara is pink and black and it doesn't even blend! Why do they have to do this to me? Why? Abeg does anybody know any other colour I can mix with the turquoise?

Then, thinking about what the Super Eagles put me through just before Mozambique handed us the ticket to the World cup is another thing. I nearly had high blood pressure. Was screaming along with the Nigerian coach..You would have thought the boys can actually hear me from the comfort of my living room.

Now as I type this the under 17 Nigerian boys wants me to have heart attack. Playing rubbish eesh. Can someborry wake lil Temmy up please.....he has been sleeping for about 3 hours now and it is 8pm. No sleep tonite that is but God knows that is for his dad because I am so going to turn my back on the two of them!

To more interesting news,remember my friend that was in an abusive relationship? I bless God for separating them and oh well Nigeria just lost to Switzerland so I may have to sign off here. Sob Sob....

Friday, 6 November 2009

Naughty By Nature

Hee hee,

Now I believe I am a naughty girl.I have done so many naughty things this week that even me, dey shocked at

Earlier this week, I woke up with a terrible cold, sneezing so badly that I was so sure my lungs might come out. How did the cold even start sef. My maid started coughing like a cat and I kinda immediately gave her medication as she will the one taking care of lil Temmy.

Before you can say Jack, Lil Temmy has started sneezing and since he believs that the best way to show me love is to either kiss me(which most times is laced with saliva) or sneeze/cough right in my face/mouth. And before you know it I caught the bug too. And for me, once I am down with cold, it must take it course of a week or so no matter what medication I use. But then I love the effect ''actifed'' has on me. It makes me float in between consciousness and unconsciousness, I swear it makes me
So I took actifed and was totally knocked out, by morning I was still feeling weak and drowsy but I had to go work. Got to the office and was feeling mad sleepy and weak. I had to think of the best excuse to get off work, and as you all know that God blessed me with a functioning brain now: it only took me 10 minutes to perfect what my plan was gonna be.

Plan A: Look for a dust filled area and inhale dust which will definitely trigger the cattarh. Luck being on my side, I didnt need to do that at all as the office cleaner just chose that moment to dust the cabinets. Oh my, I stood by to inhale as much as possible. And the sneezing started.....I sneezed so hard that i was sure my lungs were gonna pop out. Walked to my Manager's office still sneezing so hard. He didnt bother to ask me anything he just said " go home''. I am so sure the guy thot i just caught swine flu.

I also did another naugty one....i sent a text to my hubby to say that I did home pregnancy test and it was positive! I am still not sure how boo managed to get back home in one peace,wether he walked on his head or he flew home.

I kept a straight face all through the questioning phase.

Boo: How did this happen, I thought I erm we have been very careful.

Temmy:(keeping a straight face) I don't know oh.

Boo: But, we always use protection now.

Temmy:(about to laugh now but had to cover up with a cough) Yeah I know but things happen.

Aight, enough gist cos I know he will kill me if he ever sees this post.

So, me thinking I was very smart kept the strip that I used for the test hoping that he won't ask to see it. I don forget say na lawyer I marry. I dunno why lawyers have a knack for wanting to know everything sha. You need to see the way he interrogates me atimes and I wonder if he thinks he is in court or something. Sometimes I bless God that he doesn't even do litigation because I doubt if I can ever get away with any ''white'' lie.

Ehen, as I was saying he saw the strip where I hid it and the cat was let out of the bag but for me the best moment was when he sat down to question me. His expression will remain classic and priceless till kingdom

Excuse the typo peeps. I honestly cant find the icon that does the spell check and yours truly can't be bothered....