Wednesday, 22 July 2009

So, I sleep with two guys everynight.....

Yeah, the title of today's post is no joke. Now I know what it is for two guys to want the attention of just one woman all at the same time. I have been contemplating running away but come to think of it, I can't give up now. I mean, everybody has said marriage is not easy ,this and that.... but no one told me that I'd never ever ever be able to sleep alone without any disturbance again!

My son for one has never slept in a cot,he prefers to sleep on my chest till morning. Ok,that was fun when he was still about 3 months old, this boy is nearly one and he weighs about 11kg and still enjoys sleeping on my chest or not sleep at all.

You See, I woke up a few weeks back with this terrible chest pain and that was just like 2 days after MJ passed on. My chest was hurting badly and I thought to myself, am i having a heart see I can be very paranoid over silly things. That is the way i am wired(using hubby's words) Eesh...

So I called him at work to say,my chest is hurting and I am not sure it is not an attack. The boy no gree stop laughing, I was getting pissed off the more but he didn't stop. Oh yeah, after making me feel like killing him he reminded me of the sack of rice that sleeps on my chest every nite!

The funny part is since lil man sleeps on the bed with us, it makes sense that he doesn't sleep in the middle so we don't suffocate the boy with blanket or the cover cloth. So, I always lay him to the side and we give him enough space to twist and turn around the bed, we then get to manage the quarter of the bed. Babies dey enjoy sha. But this boy will leave his won part of the bed and climb on me during the night,sometimes i just feel like shouting in the middle of the night for GOD to save me.........

Somebody help me.

Tuesday, 14 July 2009

Does A Man Who Cheats On His Wife Really Love Her?

On the radio this morning, a topic came up on whether a man who cheats on his wife really love them? Both sides had valid points. Guys were saying sex outside the marriage is simply a physical thing, a release so to speak, nothing intimate about it, no emotional connection involved, as long as you hide it well, you should be okay. Women were saying that if he truly loved his wife it just wouldn't happen period no matter the lust he felt, or the temptation thrown his way, for him to cheat on her meant he really didn't care.

My personal opinion is yes, a man can love his wife yet get pleased sexually elsewhere besides home. Love isn't the problem here, respect is. I feel that once you decide to propose and get married, you should understand the responsibilities that come along with that, especially fighting temptation. You CHOSE to take your relationship to the next level, she said yes with full faith and trust in you, most women do take those vows seriously.

Though to guys sex with someone else may not mean anything, they love their spouse to death and the last thing they want is to lose their family, to the woman that's a pain that's very hard to take. You didn't respect her enough to avoid the one thing that is a sure relationship ender. Mind you, in most cases the women find out either by the mans actions, or someone else, the last thing you'd want is her finding out by someone else telling her or bringing it to her attention, now not only is she being cheated on but also humiliated because others around her know but she doesn't.

It's even worse when you have children because it shows lack of respect for your family life as a whole. It's like your saying you were willing to risk all of that just for a simple relief that you could have gotten at home. Or even worse such as in the McNair case, the wife finding out AFTER he dies!!! How do you get through something like that?! You can't ask why, your hurt, angry, disappointed, here it is he's dead but your left with the questions not just from yourself but the kids and everyone else! How do you get through those emotions, anger, hate, love, hurt you name it! Wow I couldn't imagine.

I always tell people simply because you love someone is not enough of a reason to get married and start a family, both people have to be mentally and physically prepared for such an undertaking, it takes a great deal of maturity, compromise and sacrifice. No relationship is easy but with the right amount of understanding and communication it can be made less hard. Understand that issues that you had before marriage will not go away simply because your married, if your future husband is a partyer flirt, etc, that will NOT go away with marriage.

If your future wife is insecure, jealous etc...that will not go away with marriage. If two people are serious about making that step then certain things will start to wain before hand so that they can go into the relationship with a clear mind and work on it together. Unfortunately that rarely happens. I can't tell you how many weddings I've been too for friends, families and co workers where I'm saying to myself 'goodness these people should not be getting married!' But to each it's own, where the delusion that once you get married all problems stop come from is beyond me lol. So ladies I want to hear your take on this?

Guys I want to really hear your opinions as well. In fact I want to hear how it would be taken if the shoe was on the other foot, what would you do if you found out your wife whom never gave you an inkling of a clue as to her 'dipping' out on you, was cheating on you? Would you accept the it didn't mean anything reasoning? How would you take it if it came from your friends or peers? Would you leave or would you stay? If you stayed, how would it affect your trust and relationship as a whole, could you still look at her the same?

Oh, by the way:Culled from yahoo as I was too lazy to think of what to blog about.

Friday, 10 July 2009

Are second wives going to make heaven?

Now, this is a very controversial topic but the truth is it has been boggling my mind for a while now. I know that if we do a poll there is bound to be different answers as to why they should make heaven.Some people may never come by this blog again sef but well....

Talking from personal and other peoples experiences;
1. It is the second wife that in most cases makes the father of the house to stop caring, loving, and spending on his family.

2. The woman can also make it possible for the husband to disown his kids just because they refuse to accept new ''mummy''.

3. I have heard of instances of a father moving from his palatial home to live in a room and parlour with new wife.(now I call that true love, abi).

What on earth would make a 25year old woman that has the whole world in front of her decide that she wants to be a second wife! In this generation where people pray fire for fire. She just decided she'd rather have all her husband's kids and wife wake up and curse her every minute of the day. For instance, God forbid this happening oh, if my husband decides to have mistress not to talk of a wife outside shebi na just to do 7 days of white fasting that God should eliminate the woman. Shikena. Na so she go just die because of a

Nah, in all seriousness now. Can somebody please tell me if any second wife that entered the liaison willing or unwillingly make heaven. May God forgive us all sha.

Saturday, 4 July 2009


If only I can tell my mum, mother in law and in fact everybody telling me to celebrate my son's first year birthday then surely I will be SCREAMING SHUT UP PLEASE!

There is no sense in celebrating one year birthday, not that I do not appreciate God but does the recipient(well lack of word to use) understand why everybody wants to kiss, hug and cuddle him all at once. NO! He will probably cry all through the day and if one is lucky he can sleep all through sha..

Now i am dreading picking my mum or mother in law's call cos after all the normal how are you, the next topic is BIRTHDAY! So what are we going to put in the party packs, which venue, what is he going to wear. Are we making butter cake or cup cake? I am fed up oh you two.

What am I going to do now? I went for my friend's son 1 year party today. The boy slept,woke up and cry very well when he saw all the faces gathered to kiss him. So after the parry I called a few numbers that were stuffed in my bag by aunties and mummies as party planners. The least bill I was given was N150,000.00k for the venue and bouncing castle only! What happens to the food,the party packs and drinks nko. God forbid evil thing oh. How on earth am i gonna put down 250k for a parry? When I Can start a business with that sum of money.

Anyways just had a change of mind and I will be sending this text out to my friends and family
''Due to popular demand, my husband and I have decided to hold a party in honour of our cute little one. Venue is the Civic Centre and time is 4pm till dawn. Gate fee is N5,000 and we also have Aso Ebi for N15,000. Your presence will be highly appreciated. Come one,come all.

I am so sure after seeing this text no one will bother me again. Haba!