FGF.. I need a feel good factor fast

I have not been as strong as y'all think. What is the point in lying to you guys and myself. I have been crying like an idiot for 5 days non stop now. Every phone call makes me cry, my mum being number one offender!

Backflip to Monday Nite:

Mum: how are you my dear?
Moi: i am fine mummy, how is everybody at home.
Mum: they are fine o, a dupe lowo Olorun. How is your new job my dear, i hope it isnt too stressful for you.
Moi: no mummy.
Mum: ehen jare, the reason why i called you is that i saw this green and yellow lace fabric yesterday when i went to my aunty's shop. I think it will be perfect for you and O.A(ex). For your engagement i mean. O fine gan.
Moi:Uhmn. When was the last time you spoke to O. A mum?
Mum: last week ni yen, i think. He said he was coming to se you in london. He is a good guy,omo dada ni. I wanted to send you noodles o but he said i shouldnt worry that he will buy two packs for you. Did he not bring the noodles?
Moi: he did.

Apparently, he did not tell my mum anything. He wants me to tell her abi. Very good of him to run away from another of his evil deeds!.I started thinking on what to tell mumsie, i couldnt think of anything.

Moi: sniffing as i was crying already.
Mum: My dear, what is wrong, are u ok? It must be that you have been exposing your chest to the cold.(trust my mum she always has an answer for all her questions).

Moi: yes mum. It was raining in the evening, and got caught in the rain that is why i am sniffing.
Mom: ok, pele oko mi. You will be fine, do u still have robb? Anyway, you can take care of your self. I will tell aunty that she should keep that lace for me. Infact i will tell OA as soon as he comes back to Abuja to come and see the fabric, abi ki lo feel.

Moi: Perfect! (God don catch him). Tell him ma. Mummy i have to go now. I will call you later. Bye.

I disconnected the call and i cried like a little boy that lost his football. At work, all i do is stare at my PC and before i know it tears are rolling down. Now it was so bad that yesterday i was crying on my seat and the Human Resources Manager told me she is ready to give me 4 days off work. She held me and said whatever is bothering you will be fine. Aaawghh..... another torrent of tears!
I need a feel good factor before i go crazy here.

On a lighter note,got this email from my childhood friend:
A Polish man moved to the USA and married an American girl.Although his English was far from perfect, they got along very well until one day he rushed into a lawyer's office and asked him if he could arrange a divorce for him.The lawyer said that getting a divorce could depend onthe circumstances, and asked him the following questions:

Have you any grounds?Yes, an acre and half and nice little home.
No, I mean what is the foundation of this case?
It made of concrete.

I don't think you understand. Does either of you havea real grudge?
No, we have a carport, and not need one.
I mean, what are your relations like?
All my relations still in Poland .
Is there any infidelity in your marriage?
We have hi-fidelity stereo and good DVD player.But I no mind, She can have it!
Does your wife beat you up?No, I always up before her. I sleep only 6 hours.
Is your wife a nagger?No, she white.
Why do you want this divorce? She is going to kill me.
What makes you think that?I got proof.
What kind of proof?She is going to poison me. She bought a bottle at a drugstore and put on shelf in bathroom.
I can read English, and it says:
"Polish Remover"